The Duck With The Human Mind: A Brief Lesson In Letting Go

If you've ever read anything by Eckhart Tolle, you'll probably know what this question will point to. If you haven't, "The Duck With The Human Mind" is essentially an analogy of the inner workings of the human mind and it's inability to let go of what was.

The analogy goes a little like this - A duck, when presented with a problem/feud with another duck, will appear to "argue" until, well, the end of the argument. Following this though, rather than seeming to keep thinking about the problem, and therefore prolonging the recovery of the problem, the duck simply flaps it's wings and get's on with it's day. The duck let's go of the problem, and to the duck, the problem is no more.

“The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward.” - Steve Maraboli

Human's on the other hand, generally do not deal with their problems this way. An argument will occur and come to an end or a stand still. Rather than letting the problem go, humans tend to keep the argument going in their heads or with others much longer than is necessary or even helpful. An overall way to look at this is, if something "bad" happens to you, rather than change it or accept it, and simply get on with our day, we as human beings, have a wonderful tendency to TELL OTHER PEOPLE this awful thing happened to us. We're the only animal in the kingdom capable of this devastating faux pas. In doing this, we not only carry this pain with us - usually until we've just forgotten about it because let's be real, it was not that important in the first place. But we elaborate on it and emphasis the issues we've faced or are facing. So it seems to the people around us that our problems are challenging and stretching us massively!

We surrender our power in the situation and surrender to our lack there of. We justify with ourselves that we are right in being upset and that something exterior has MADE us feel this way. THIS IS NOT THE CASE! A reaction to an external problem is only EVER a true mirror of our own personal internal and unsolved issues. How we react to things is simply an accurate reflection of how we feel on the inside. If we are having a good day, something could happen in our lives that doesn't seem like such a big deal. If the same thing happens when we're having a bad day our reaction is a reflection of that. We react much more negatively to the event than we would if we were in a positive frame of mind.

For example, you're having a bad day already and your pipe bursts in your house. You now have an untold amount of soggy belongings to deal with as well as having to pay for a plumber and take the afternoon off work to make sure you're home when he arrives AND you'll now be without running water for at least a day. THIS IS CATASTROPHIC!!! How could this happen?? Why do bad things happen to you?? This couldn't have come at a WORSE TIME!!! However, if this comes on a good day it really doesn't seem so bad and hell, you could use the afternoon off work anyway, right?!

What Eckhart Tolle is trying to uncover here, is the unique inability humans possess, to let go of the past. When two ducks fight, they have their altercation, fly off in different directions and flap their wings. Ultimately emitting the built up negative energy inside them in order to, well, just let it go. Which they seem to do. Of course, there's no scientific method (as yet) to know this for sure but the analogy stands to reason.

Isn't it embodied in every one of us because our pasts and experiences are what shape us into the people we are today?

Yes, they are. However, that doesn't mean it's in any way helpful to hold onto the past. How do you let go of the past? In theory it's very simple - it just takes some practice. Letting go of the past (the past being years, months, days or even minutes in clock-time) requires one force - The Now. Becoming present and moving your attention into The Now is the only way to let go of the past. Becoming present allows you to accept the past because it is the past.

Being fully in The Now requires only one thing - your attention. The simple act of bringing your focus into what is at this moment will bring sensations of peace. It's not something I could explain simply in a few sentences but there are many ways you can improve your focus, just to name a few; whatever you're holding in your hand at this moment, ask yourself "how does it feel?" then feel it! Move your attention to your hand. Do you feel the life within your hand and from there your arm.... Moving all the way through your body? If you don't, your focus is not in the present. Practice this whenever the thought hits you to be present. Feel yourself and ask yourself how you're feeling. Whatever the answer, acceptance is key - positive or negative. The reason for this is that negative feelings cannot survive once met with the force of acceptance because they are neutralised.

The present moment if a gift if you use it correctly. Another way is to concerntrate on your breathing, allowing your attention to flow back and forth with your breath. I find Pranayama breathing is a fantastic way of catching my attention, particularly on a busy day. Twinned with yoga practice is actually a very difficult way to pull my focus away from the present!

"Life gives you plenty of time to do whatever you want to do if you stay in the present moment." - Deepak Chopra

Noticing things around you is too, the essence of presence. Not labelling things or judging them, just seeing them as they are. Take a look around yourself right now. Are you in a busy or quiet place? If it's busy, what are the people around you doing? What stories do their faces tell? If it's quiet, what do you hear? If you're outside, how does the temperature feel? All of these small questions are chief among what you could be asking yourself in any situation of life in order to be more present.

Understanding this esoteric concept is not for the unwilling but if you'd like to know more about becoming present, reading Eckhart Tolle's "The Power Of Now" is a great place to start (and even a good place to finish).

I preferred listening to the audiobook as it's depth, for me, was much greater than listening to the voice in my own head. You'll understand why if you read it. Click here to buy it now, or do as I did and click here to listen to it for free.

There are a few techniques I've used in my own life that have helped me to thrive in the present moment:

Snowballing - nip it in the bud

Turn your negative thoughts around - be grateful instead

Make a game of it

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Written by Charlotte Deverill