1 Piece of Advice I Wish I Knew As A Child

"How is it other people seem to have their lives so up together? I'm drowning here!"

If I knew, as a kid, what I know now it definitely wouldn't seem half as difficult or surprising to me!

Have you hit a dead end or are you just looking for ways to improve? I've been both people at some points in my life and trying to figure out the algorithm to consistently get what you want out of life sometimes seems down right impossible. Other people seem to have it down don't they?

-So what's the secret?

This one piece of advice has brought me out of many dips and continues to be the most valuable thing I know when it comes to getting what I want out of life.

TAILOR YOUR ENVIRONMENT TO SUPPORT YOUR GOALS!

I don't say this lightly. Rearranging things in your life to constantly keep your focus and attention on your goals is the most important avenue of actually completing them. - BELIEVE ME!

For some people the goal could be sticking to the diet, for others it could be to go to the gym 4 times a week or starting up a business. Whatever the goal is, make changes to tailor your surroundings to support it!

It could be something that seems as simple as taking your vitamins every morning, if you set things up to support this then you have a much better chance of consistently doing it. You could leave your vitamins on the kitchen counter near the water tap, or make sure you have a pot you use to take them with you if you go away somewhere instead of leaving them in the drawer gathering dust only to be disappointed once you get to work and realise yet again, you've forgotten to take them! All of these little things make it so that it is as easy as possible for you to keep to your end of the bargain. They could even act as simple reminders for you to do it! They don't take themselves after all!

Personally, I was always terrible at remembering to take my vitamins. I'd leave the house only to remember on my way to the office that they were still sat there, untouched, almost every. Damn. Morning. But all was not lost! I realized, if I really wanted to remember to take them I had to make changes to support that. I bought a pill box which I refill every Sunday night and each night as I prepare for the next day I put the next box in my bag. Then, even if it should slip my mind to take them in the morning with breakfast, I have them with me so as soon as I get a chance, I can! Setting reminders on your phone are also a great way to help.

Look at it like this, the reason you keep your toothbrush in your bathroom, probably near the sink is because that is the easiest place for it to be when you know you're going to be brushing your teeth twice a day. You wouldn't keep it in a box under your bed would you?

The same rules apply here. If you want to lose weight, instead of keeping the junk food in the bottom drawer, silently keeping it's tempting eye on you, throw it out! Simple and effective - you can't eat it if it isn't there! Most importantly, you've removed the battle you face with your willpower every time you walk past or stumble across it, eventually it will wear you down and you're going to give in.

“It’s not that some people have the willpower and some don’t. It’s that some people are ready to change and others are not.”

- James Gordon

The reason for this is because willpower is merely a finite resource. A finite resource that is constantly being drained throughout the whole day! Willpower is an interesting concept in that, it is almost like a health or power bar on a video game, each time we exert willpower or any kind of emotional control, we drain a little from our power bar. For example, if you're on a diet but keep the junk food in the bottom drawer, each time you're tempted to sneak into the drawer and grab a cookie, your willpower gets drained a little more. You can imagine how difficult it will be to stay on track when you find yourself fighting this battle multiple times on a daily basis!

Exerting emotional control can disguise itself in many different forms such as if you're out with friends and you feel sad, rather than feel how you do, you fool those around you by pretending to be happy - this exerts massive amounts of emotional control and in turn, wreaks havoc on your power bar.

On the plus side, exerting willpower on goal-orientated subjects actually strengthens our ability in completing that task consistently because the more often you do something, the more willpower you generate for yourself.

"The people that seemingly have mastery over themselves and their willpower are not the one's with the deepest reserves. They are the one's who have set up their lives in such a way that they drain their willpower the least throughout their day".

- Charlie Hooper (Charisma University)

An important thing to do this is, in order to understand where you need to make these changes, you must first understand the pitfalls that lead to unsuccessful goal attempts. If you know that if your buddies call you and you know you're more likely to go out with them then sit down and study for an hour - switch off your phone so you can't be contacted. Set up hard and fast rules so you don't need to deliberate whether or not to do something - you already know what you're doing because you made a promise to yourself.

Another great way to make sure you reach your goals is by adapting your identity so that "you are the type of person who does this thing". If really you know you're the type of person who says they'll go to the gym but instead goes to the bar, don't be disappointed when you get on the scales and realise you haven't lost those 3lbs yet.

Become the person who would do the type of thing you want to achieve by changing your identity to match your goals. Letting it become you will eventually make it true much quicker than you think!

WILLPOWER BY ROY BAUMEISTER & JOHN TIERNEY

This video explains how willpower works in a little more detail. The key here is reserving your willpower for things that REALLY matter and decisions that really do need to made - don't waste your time with a bunch of crap that isn't going to get you on the way to where you want to be.

Be smart, willpower knows no obstacles. Find your greatness :)

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Written by Charlotte Deverill